Humble beginnings...

Everywhere you look, every channel you turn to, everyone you talk to - you can't escape it. We, this country, are in big trouble.

My parents - but more so my dad - grew up in the depression. He always encouraged me to understand the importance of not living outside your means and not getting in debt. I listened, but I didn't. My parents didn't use credit cards and if they did, they'd pay them off immediately.

I wished I'd listened to him and really took to heart what he was saying. I would always rationalize my spending by saying "some people like money, some people like what money can buy" or the famous "you can't take it with you!".

It's not like you wake up one day and have thousands of dollars of debt. A couple hundred here, fifty there, that unexpected, spontaneous vacation that you validate by needing it for your mental health... you marry someone that has a few thousand on a credit card... its a snowball affect that the creditors hope you'll fall prey to.

Credit for everybody! It's the American dream! No matter how poor you are, you can have pretty much whatever you want! Well, because of that way of thinking,that dream is now a nightmare. It's hard to believe that so may of us, so many of us who knew better, fell into this trap!!

I am hoping that I can treat this like all the other hardships in my life - as a lesson and an opportunity for growth. I'm just hoping that this isn't one of those "it's too late" kind of lessons to learn. Sometimes I get really worked up about it and wonder what we'll do if my business continues to drop off and we don't sell the other house. It's taking everything we make now to make it. I don't want to be like people I know who are my age and have already had to file bankruptcy. What if Matt gets laid off from him job like so many other people in this country, especially those who work in factories? I get so pissed at myself and feel like a big loser, a big irresponsible loser for not saving money back when I had one house payment and made more money... why did I have to be so careless and not think about the future?? I was too busy thinking about and living it up in the here and now. Another depression?? No way, that was in the old days, the powers that be would NEVER let that happen in this country again! Too many smart, responsible folk in important positions to let something like that happen to their people!!

So now you think.... will it get even worse? Some people seem to think so. I feel guilty for even worrying about what might happen because for so many people there is no "what if", its a cold hard reality and they have kids to take care of, which at least I don't have to worry about... God bless those people.